Exhausted

When I wake up feeling exhausted from a good nights sleep, I know what kinda day my body is going to have. I just want to climb back in bed and sleep it off but duty calls. I will go to work anyway with affirmation of thankfulness and joy to be alive to feel the pain.

Thank you Jesus for giving me another day to live for you and share you with others.

Hospital Week

It’s officially Friday (the 13th for you superstitious ones) y’all! 🙌

I WON!

This week was hospital week and I just so happen to work in a little rural hospital. Even though I work in the office part, I still got to be a part of the daily shenanigans.

We have two lovely souls that run our HR department and each day this week they had a sweet little something for the entire hospital. The theme for the week was travel. Each day we traveled to a different country. It was sure a fun week of daily games, food, drinks, and fun. We also played a week long bingo game. Fortunately, I did get a bingo on Thursday and was gifted a $25 gift card to Best Buy. I was so stoked that I actually won something. 😂 Now to figure out what to buy with it 🤔

For todays finale they had breakfast for us all and a special “surprise” if we wore our badge while getting our plate. I was very happily surprised when they were handing each one of us a gift certificate for gasoline! Y’all that is so HUGE for us employees and our tiny little hospital.

I just wanted to give a shout out to my hospital family, especially our HR department, for always showing us such appreciation. It’s the little things that keep us motivated to work hard, even through those frustrating days. Our CEO is so good to us all, from the bottom all the way up, and he is always showing us his appreciation.

Summer Heat

I don’t know about where you’re at but in Texas we’ve already got that summer heat goin on and it is way to soon!

Typically this time of year it starts mild and gradually heating us up in preparation for July and August. This year, however, we are having July and August in May and June as well 🥵

Praying for rain and no triple digit days.

Do you hate your life?

Someone told me they hate their life the other day. My response was well I don’t hate mine. I love my life! I really do.

Life is what you make of it. If you’re negative all the time and only focus on the negative things that happen every day then you’re going to think and produce negativity in everything you do and say. What you’re putting in, through tv, games, people you’re around, etc, if it’s rarely anything positive then you will only produce negative thoughts, behavior, and words say about yourself and to others.

I have told my kids their entire lives that you are who you run with because it’s so true. If you run with negative you’ll produce negative. In every single situation, whether it be good or bad, there is ALWAYS positive. We may not always be able to find it in the moment, but it’s always in there. Negativity is easy to find. Positive is harder so we must seek it out.

So, no matter what life throws your way, choose to be joyfully happy and find the positive in each situation, instead of focusing on the bad stuff and reproducing that.

😃 Don’t Worry; Be Happy 😃 It really is a choice we get to make for ourselves.

Worst Flare Up To Date

Having had 3 flare ups already this month, I knew when I woke up that morning it was going to be an RA/Fibro flare kinda day but this has been the worst one yet. For what ever reason, flares are happening more often than what I’m used to. My daily meds aren’t seeming to help much anymore. 🤔

(Meme found online)

When my alarm went off to begin my work day, I could barely roll over to even hit the snooze button. After snoozing a few times I managed to get myself up enough to sit up on the side of my bed to wake my body up completely. I do this every single morning but this particular morning the “stiffness” was so intense that my body felt as if it had been injected with the thickness of molasses or something. My body seemed so heavy that the movement seemed to me as if I was moving in slow motion. It was like watching a turtle cross the road and impatiently waiting as to not kill the poor thing from trying to hurry it along. The pain radiated from each movement and felt like the heat coming off of an intense fire was racing through my joints. I knew I needed a hot shower to help get me moving a bit better or I wasn’t gonna be able to even get dressed. Usually a hot shower feels good and will loosen my joints up enough to move but that morning the shower didn’t even help me like it normally does. Not wanting to allow my body to control my day, I got dressed and went off to work pushing through the intense pain. Typically putting my mind to work offsets the miserable feeling that’s happening within my body that is unexplainable to others.

We all take a day off to play hooky once in a while. Those days are enjoyable right!?! But to take a day off or have to leave early because my body is not lining up with what my mind wants it to do is down right aggravating. I don’t like having to miss work, especially for reasons beyond my control such as a stupid flare up.

Eventually I did make it to work and wasn’t late by the 8 a m standard. However, I felt late because I am always there early to get logged into my stuff and be ready to work at 8 a m. As the day progressed, I got worse. I was beginning to convince myself that I had picked up a bug or something. I just wasn’t able to function like how a “normal” RA/Fibro day goes for me. I had eaten breakfast and it didn’t bother me but by lunch time, I was afraid to even eat because of how I felt. My stomach was so queasy that I just didn’t want to take any chances. I hate to throw up!

As the day went on, my stomach felt more and more queasy and I began to get a mild headache from the nausea. Eventually, around 1:30, I ran to the bathroom and vomited. I felt some what better. So I thought okay, now I am good. Well it didn’t last long. I tried to stay at work to keep my mind occupied and off of the pain. Finally, around 3 I felt like I was gonna puke again so I decided it best to journey home and try to just sleep it off. After about 20 minutes of driving, takes me 35 minutes to get home, I wound up pulling over and got sick on the side of the road. Once I did make it home, I laid down and slept for almost two hour. When I woke up, I was fine. I was back to my “normal” every day pain levels. The nausea was gone, no headache, I had some energy, I could maneuver my body and I knew that flare up had passed. I was able to eat supper and everything.

That’s the worst flare up I’ve had to date. My first time to actually vomit from one.

Thankfully I am blessed enough to have some amazing co workers that refuse to let me allow myself to go down a “whoa is me”, staying mad at myself for such stupidity type of a rabbit hole. They can tell when I need help and I won’t even have to ask. They just help me. I couldn’t have asked for better co workers in my life.

(Meme found online)

Anyone living with Rheumatoid Arthritis, especially with the Fibromyalgia crap too, can relate to these types of flares. Being tired for us isn’t just the tired someone feels from a long sleepless night or a long hard days work, it is down right debilitating fatigue to the point of our mind is in a fog and our body just doesn’t work correctly. We forget, get confused, and totally go blank even on the easy stuff that just comes naturally to us on our “normal” days. We just want to sleep 🛌! Plus sleeping helps us to not feel the pain.

During such flare days, I won’t even recognize that I need help most times but those that I am around the most can tell when I’m just not being myself. My husband especially. He is my rock star! I could NOT make it through this disease without such help from him and those people around me that just know, especially when the brain fog is so horrible that I don’t even recognize how “off” my day is going, that I need help to make it through my day. They never ask what can they do, they just do!

I hate this disease and what’s happening to my body and mind that is beyond my control but I do love my life and those that God has placed in it. I would never want to do this life alone.

Thank you to those that just know. I am so grateful and love each of you beyond measure!

Another Rest

Well I’ve had another rest from blogging, and other stuff, as I’m sure y’all that follow me have noticed.

I never know when I will feel good and when I will feel awful due to this chronic pain I live with. Let’s just say that I’ve had more down days than up lately for a number of reasons. I pray to be on the track to feeling good for more than a couple days at a time now. I just never know what each day holds for me until I begin it.

I have found myself cancelling things and saying no more than ever, even when I really want to. I apologize more than ever because I just can’t!! I hate the hold this autoimmune disease has over me. It isn’t just one thing. I have a number of things that taunt me daily.

So many say there “well just do this” or “have you tried…” and “I know that feeling” when really they don’t have a clue! I don’t even try to explain anymore I just say “thanks for that advice” or “I’ll try that” just to move the conversation on from even talking about it any further. Most days I just want to scream but even that’s to exhausting. 😂

Any-who, enough about that!!

Pray for me and my husband! Say a special prayer for those not even in my life these days, whether they’ve chosen to walk away or I’ve just distanced myself from them, to love me through it anyway.

Good night world! May God hold your hand through the hard times just as He does for me because without God, I probably wouldn’t even be here. 💕

Frustrating Day

My morning started off pretty good. My husband and I got up and prepared to head out for the hour and a half trip to see my Rheumatologist but we were quickly halted when my husband found that our water heater had been leaking. Thankfully he seen it before we had a complete mess on our hands. The drain pan was almost to the rim full of water. It would not have made it another week until he got back so, after a few calls, he got in touch with a plumber that could replace it TODAY! WooHoo, thank ya Lord! So we gather what info we need from the old one in order to buy a new one.

We finish getting ready to go and head out.

Next stop, Dr office.

That appointment was also a frustrating ordeal. First my husband wasn’t allowed to even go inside with me, due to this covid19 crap, then the lab tech chased a vein in my right arm for a good five minutes before deciding to try my left arm for a good vein. Of course she got it the first stick only for something goofy to happen and her wind up having to chase that vein too for some reason. BUT she was finally able to get her three tubes of blood from that arm so that’s good. The tech was very nice and apologetic during it all, which I greatly appreciated, so that was helpful in keeping my frustration at a minimal. I even told her it was fine, no need to apologize because it just happens that way some times and she appreciated my understanding.

Next stop is Lowe’s for our brand new water heater. So thankful that we had the means necessary in order to purchase a new one but this too took longer than expected. The gentleman that helped us was very nice and LOVED to chit chat. After finally getting what we needed the nice gentleman even helped my husband get it outside and into the back of our pick up.

So, off we go for our journey back home because the plumber we were able to get in touch with will have his “hands” to meet us there. Once the two gentlemen got the tank drained and outside, they began the install of the new one. BUT, you guessed it, they have some unexpected issues with the install and it is now going to take way longer than expected to complete the job.

Thankfully, once they are complete and outta here, all is well once again.

UNTIL it isn’t.

As I began to clean up the mess, not a big one, left behind from the job that has taken several hours to complete, I find that the new water heater is now leaking. I call the plumber and after a few “discussions” on a few different calls, we both agree that it’ll be fine to wait til morning for them to come back and see what’s happening now.

So my husband is back where he needs to be for work and I am off to bed to begin my morning in the morning, once more, with the water heater situation.

Moral of this story you may ask……..I just felt like sharing part of my very frustrating day with y’all and also to share that SATAN DID NOT WIN TODAY!!

I’m now off to lay my frustrations down at the feet of Jesus and have a great night of peaceful rest in spite of my frustrating day.

Hopefully y’all can do the same and have a good night!

Covid-19

Make shift office

Who else is tired of being quarantined already!?! I’ve had my fill of it too. However, it’s very important to remember that in any and all situations there’s a positive some where but most of the time we have to dig for it to find it.

So, here’s my positive.

On the bright side, I get to work from home. That’s pretty cool actually. I get to spend more time with my husband, I’ve had LOTS of time with him lately (next blog), and love on my animals all while working and getting paid.

God uses ALL things for good. Romans 8:28

Stay safe and clean out there y’all. Wash! Wash! Wash! Those hands. Cover! Cover! Cover! Those sneezes and coughs. Stay! Stay! Stay! In groups of ten or less.

And remember, this to shall pass.

Young Living

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I’mma “Spoonie”

youtu.be/jn5IBsm49Rk

A well explained way of my daily life with the issues I live with. Take the time to watch this and maybe it’ll help you to understand…..

Fibromyalgia

Have you ever really in truly thought about what you put into your body? Me neither! Well today I had an awakening, more than before, to pay even more attention to that very thing.

I have some health concerns that, to me, aren’t really “concerns” but rather just a daily reminder that I have issues from never having a day free from pain. I stay in pain twenty four / seven due to them, but the one I want to talk about today is the fact that I suffer from fibromyalgia.

Now, for those of you that do not know what that is: MayoClinic.org explains it this way; Fibromyalgia is a disorder characterized by widespread musculoskeletal pain accompanied by fatigue, sleep, memory and mood issues. Researchers believe that fibromyalgia amplifies painful sensations by affecting the way your brain processes pain signals. Having said that, I take medicine daily for the many different pains I live with. Occasionally though, I will have what is known as a “flare”. A flare is when symptoms intensify without warning and can last anywhere from a few days to a few weeks. One just never knows when it will come on or even how long it might last.

Having said all of that, I wanted to blog about it because I watched a YouTube video today that shed some light on the subject for me that I had never seen before. It taught me that someone with fibromyalgia that consumes foods with copper should not do so. Copper, in anything if ingested, can have lots of repercussions for someone with fibromayalgia. We can receive significant pain from it.

First of all, I had no clue that copper was even found in foods, vitamins, and even in our water. What!?! So I did what anyone that had just learned something new would do, I googled it. It gave me a list of the top ten foods to avoid that contain copper and wouldn’t you know some of those foods would be my FAVORITES to eat!?! For instance, DARK CHOCOLATE contains copper…..no way! Another one of my faves is CRAB LEGS! It also stated that pork of any kind contains copper. NOT MY BACON!!!! Anything processed or containing something from the intestinal parts of an animal, such as liver, gizzard, etc., will contain copper.

I might as well just stop eating all together and just live on protein drinks, chips, and Dr. Pepper!! I mean just about everything I eat isn’t good for me now a days any way right, especially now that I know about this new found copper knowledge.

Anywho, now that I have learned to pay closer attention to things I consume for an ingredient known as copper, I will be checking all the labels as I go. But the one thing I refuse to give up is my Dr. Pepper a day. I will consume that until the day I die or I can not lift the can myself anymore. But wait, that’s when a straw will come in handy…LOL!